Speaking from Stillness is a fun series transcribing unscripted thoughts while on morning dog walks in my jungle valley. I walk in stillness, then allow whatever arises to get recorded and transcribed. I try to keep them short. The transcript is lightly edited for clarity.
What is my Purpose? Such a human question.
Likely an only human question.
Why am I here? What am I supposed to be doing?
This question begets a sense of uncertainty.
It also creates a state where
We don’t know what we are, or what we’re supposed to do,
In order to find fulfillment or satisfaction.
In this current culture, in this current time,
Purpose gets tied up
With striving,
With achieving,
With reaching a goal,
Accessing an object or a state,
Where we will feel a sense of fulfillment.
This is wrapped up in Identity.
I am a caregiver, I give to others, I put their needs ahead of mine.
I am an achiever, I create great wealth for myself and
Perhaps I share back with a wider community and
Get my name on a building, so I have longevity and standing.
I am an artist and I create.
Maybe because I cannot help myself but create,
But maybe I do it for fame, for recognition,
For all the trappings of the rock and roll lifestyle.
I’m a parent who will focus everything on my children,
As procreation and creating the greatest little humans possible
Is a Purpose, is a state of fulfillment,
And hopefully the empty-nest state won’t last too long, and
Perhaps grandchildren will arrive.
This is all Striving to Achieve something.
Inherent in the question ‘What is my Purpose’
Is that something must be accomplished,
Something must be added to what you are.
Because just to be what you are, how could that possibly be enough?
And then when you throw health and impending death,
Doom of the individual-self,
There creates a greater sense of anxiety.
That, and the envy of watching others around,
Assuming that they must know their Purpose,
They must be achieving their Purpose.
Why am I behind?
Sometimes one of my dogs will be jealous
That another one has the bone that they want.
It might try to acquire it through force, or patience,
But it’s not a perpetual state of yearning,
It’s a momentary imbalance.
It’s a momentary imbalance because they are in The Now,
They don’t ask what their Purpose is,
They Just Do.
It’s time to run.
It’s time to play.
It’s time to scare away the people at the fence.
It’s time to eat.
It’s time to sleep.
It’s time to cuddle.
It’s time to wake up and begin all over again.
We humans are complicated.
We humans make complications.
The challenge is in
The striving,
The acquiring,
The achieving,
To make yourself more than what you are.
There is an anguishing social media post recently I saw that
‘I only want to date my husband…but to find my husband I have to date, and
I don’t want to date!’
Embedded in this is the,
‘I cannot be fulfilled until I find my husband,
I cannot be happy with who I am now,
I will not be happy until I find my husband.’
That statement made me happy that I have five dogs and don’t date!
The search to acquire something,
The search to try and feed the sense of Identity
That our Ego creates for us…
That is Suffering.
We don’t want that, so we run away from it.
We want that, so we run towards it, and cling to it.
But Truth unveils that you cannot add things to yourself,
Acquire, achieve, strive for things,
Because they will make no difference.
You will be happy for a moment,
When the striving stops,
But within seconds, the new striving will begin.
Why we strive is we Know inside,
Deep, deep in our Being,
That We Are…
One.
That this ego-identity with boundaries
Is a Charade,
Is an Illusion.
We, at our core essence,
Are Infinite,
We Are One,
And we long to return back to that state.
The great gift of a Glimpse is…
It is a touching…
Of Awareness
Of The infinite.
It is a recognition that we are More than this finite-mind-body we appear to be.
It shakes up our snow globe and it allows us to start to recognize
The Truth…
That we are Already Whole.
That no striving or achieving will help,
And no striving and achieving is required.
Our Purpose is to Recognize That,
That we are part of The Infinite.
We Are Whole, as We Are,
In This Moment,
And We Are to sit and Be,
In This Moment,
And Experience fully Everything that Is,
In This Moment.
To Be True to This Moment Is…
Truth.
And recognizing this, and
Relinquishing the achievements and the striving,
That Is The Purpose.
The Purpose…
Is Here,
Is Now,
Is One.
Marinate in it!
